帮我改改英文作文这是一篇日记(题目是休闲活动),如果格式或者其他地方错了请帮忙改改.Dear Diary,Today is my school holiday ,I play all day.In the morning,my parent and I went to teahouse,we ate dim sum and chatted.Lat

帮我改改英文作文这是一篇日记(题目是休闲活动),如果格式或者其他地方错了请帮忙改改.Dear Diary,Today is my school holiday ,I play all day.In the morning,my parent and I went to teahouse,we ate dim sum and chatted.Lat
帮我改改英文作文
这是一篇日记(题目是休闲活动),如果格式或者其他地方错了请帮忙改改.
Dear Diary,
Today is my school holiday ,I play all day.
In the morning,my parent and I went to teahouse,we ate dim sum and chatted.Later,my mother and I went to shopping,in Mong Kok,
I bought clothes and shoes,but my mother bought cosmetic and handbag.
In the afternoon,my mother and I went to Japan restaurant ate lunch,we ate sushi,was very yummy,later,we went to cinema saw a movie,the movie name was Avater,this was science fiction,the film was very hot,the length of a film was 16 minutes,was very good.Eneed the film,I went to swimming in Kowloon Park Swimming Pool,the water was very cold and filthy.
In the evening,my parent and I went to Pizza Hut ate dinner,I ate
Baked Spaghetti Bolongnaise with cheese,was very yummy.Next time,my
friends and I went to Kowloon Park Gymnasium played badminton,we were very tired,later my friend and I went to karaoke,we singer very happy,but I at daybreak to went home.
This is my holiday.
14th 6 June

帮我改改英文作文这是一篇日记(题目是休闲活动),如果格式或者其他地方错了请帮忙改改.Dear Diary,Today is my school holiday ,I play all day.In the morning,my parent and I went to teahouse,we ate dim sum and chatted.Lat
第一排 “I have played all day”
第二排 parents
第三排 went shopping
第四排 没有转折语气 最好用 and
第五排 Japanese restaurant it was very.
第六排 直接用 went to cinema ,或者saw a movie .the movie named Avater ,
第七排 the length of the film was 16minutes ,it was very good
第八 went to swim in Kowloon Park's swimming pool 你是不是想表达 水脏 ,dirty 好些
第九 parents ate 改成eat
第十 如英国想表达“和” 就 把 with 改成and,it is very yummy.next time 改成 then
第十一 改成play
十二 friends “we singer very happy” 不知道你要表达什么 应该是 we felt very happy ,后面一句,I went home at daybreak
格式 左上角是日期(年、月、日)、星期 应是 June 14th

Dear Diary，
Today is my school holiday , I play(played) all day.
In the morning, my parent and I went to teahouse, we ate dim sum and chatted. Later, my mother and I went to shopping, in Mong ...

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Dear Diary，
Today is my school holiday , I play(played) all day.
In the morning, my parent and I went to teahouse, we ate dim sum and chatted. Later, my mother and I went to shopping, in Mong Kok,
I bought clothes and shoes, but my mother bought cosmetic and handbag.
In the afternoon, my mother and I went to (a Japan)Japan restaurant ate lunch, we ate sushi,(it was)was very yummy,later,we went to (a cinema)cinema saw a movie, the movie(movie's) name was Avater, this was (a science)science fiction, the film was very hot,the length of (the)a film was 16 minutes, was very good.Eneed the film, I went to swimming in Kowloon Park Swimming Pool,the water was very cold and filthy.
In the evening, my parent and I went to Pizza Hut ate dinner, I ate
Baked Spaghetti Bolongnaise with cheese, was very yummy.Next time,my
friends and I went to Kowloon Park Gymnasium played badminton, we were very tired, later my friend and I went to karaoke, we singer very happy,but I at daybreak to went home.
This is my holiday.
14th 6 June
冠词漏用较多，还是用汉语思维在写，逗号也有些问题

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